Worst Team Names in Professional Sports

Some professional sports teams have iconic names, names that make sense. Take the Pittsburgh Steelers, for example. Pittsburgh was the king of the steel industry in the United States for many years. It makes complete sense that their National Football League team would be named the Steelers.

Then, there are those team nicknames that just don’t fit. Utah is definitely not a hot spot for Jazz. What’s with the Sabre – which is spelled weirdly to begin with – in Buffalo? And what is a Wild anyway? The Minnesota Wild. What’s that all about?

Those are just a few of many. Here is a look at some of the worst team names in professional sports.

The Land of 10,000 Lakes

If you didn’t know, Minnesota is the land of 10,000 lakes. There are actually more. Currently, there are 11,842 lakes of over 10 acres and over 14,000 lakes that have been named in the state. 

In 1946, the Detroit Gems of the National Basketball League packed up and moved to Minneapolis, Minnesota. The franchise was aptly renamed the Lakers and won their first NBL title in 1948. 

In 1960, the team was in the midst of a post-George Mikan dry spell and owner Bob Short decided to move the team to Los Angeles. The franchise kept the Lakers nickname despite California, massive in size compared to Minnesota, having just 3,000 lakes. 

Brown Is a Color

Yes, Brown is a color and a very boring one at that. New franchises that pop up in the different professional sports leagues in North America typically don’t use brown as part of their color scheme.

The Cleveland Browns were kind of forced into it. The franchise took its name from their legendary first head coach – Paul Brown. It’s definitely well-deserving, but the Browns have the worst color scheme and uniforms in the NFL. They also haven’t won a championship since those early days with Brown as their head coach. 

Maybe New England will change its name to the Belichicks. Green Bay Lombardis? Pittsburgh Nolls? Naming a team after a person just doesn’t work, but the Browns name is here to stay.

These MLS Names Are Awful

Major League Soccer (MLS) tries to embrace everything that’s European about soccer. One problem. Americans aren’t Europeans and in a country that craves the NFL, the NBA, MLB, and college sports, no one pays much attention to what’s going on in MLS.

That’s probably why if you asked the average American sports fan what is Sporting Kansas City, you would probably get a big “what?” in return. Yes, Sporting Kansas City is a franchise in MLS located in, you guessed it, Kansas City.

Then, there is Real Salt Lake City. Again, what? The New York Red Bulls? Hey, we’re named after an energy drink. 

How about Inter Miami CF? Now, for those that live in Miami or the Miami area, this might make sense. CF is the abbreviation for Club de Futbol, i.e. Football Club. The Inter Miami Football Club. For most of the U.S., Spanish is not a second language. Just another epic fail from MLS.

Speaking of Sports Leagues

The WNBA went full on singular nicknames when the league started in 1996. The league now has 13 teams and eight of them have singular nicknames. The creativity was abundant as the Chicago franchise chose “Sky.” 

Connecticut went even deeper in thought to come up with “Sun.” What special connection does Chicago have to Sky or Connecticut to Sun” And how about the Minnesota Lynx? The largest population of lynx in the U.S. is in Maine. Oh well, at least the league makes money, right?

Play Some Jazz

If you’ve ever been to New Orleans, you know the history of jazz music. Considered the birthplace of modern jazz, New Orleans also used to be the home of an NBA franchise. Remember Pistol Pete Maravich? The guy was incredible playing for the New Orleans Jazz.

The team struggled in the late 1970s and right at the beginning of the 1975-76 season the Jazz were shut down by the league because they failed to make payroll. In 1979, the Jazz were moved to Utah where they began play in the 1979-80 season. 

The move was quick and there was not enough time prior to the start of the 1979-80 season to approve a name change. Even though there isn’t a jazz music scene pretty much anywhere in Utah, the team kept the name.

Only Predators Here

So, the first thing that comes to mind when you think of Nashville, Tennessee, is … Predators! Seriously, what Predators do you find in a city that is known as the Music City? Maybe the Gibson ES-335 is a new known predator in the area? If you didn’t know, that would be one of several guitars made by Gibson.

There’s nothing “predator” about Nashville or Tennessee. However, someone happened to stumble upon the skeleton of some sort of saber-toothed cat that was dug up in downtown Nashville in 1971. And now, the NHL has the Predators.

I Got Me a Merlin

It’s pretty easy to understand that the Washington franchise in the NBA had to do something. “Bullets” was not cutting it anymore in the modern landscape. The franchise decided to act.

Now, remember this is a franchise located in the nation’s capital. The other major sports franchises in the city are the Capitals (NHL), Nationals (MLB), and Commanders (NFL).

Given the location and Washington, D.C. being the capital of the U.S., the city’s NBA franchise decided to change its nickname from Bullets to … wait for it … Wizards. Yeah, Wizards is right up there with Capitals and Nationals. 

The franchise could probably use another name change to go along with a roster overhaul. The Wizards have been the worst or one of the worst teams in the league for the last several years.

The Pelican Brief

Remember the John Grisham novel and then the subsequent movie? Yeah, that was good stuff. No where in reading the book or watching the movie did I ever think about an NBA team. 

Pelicans, of course, live all over the bayou and the brown pelican is the state bird of Louisiana. The team wanted to align with Louisiana culture and the region, but Pelicans? 

“Hey, who are you playing tonight?”

“We’re playing the Pelicans.” Pelicans in no way, shape, or form inspires any form of confidence or emotion. It has to be the least fearful, least inspiring nickname in all of sports. Yes, the pelican is important to the region, but name your NBA franchise after it? Who were the marketing brainiacs that came up with that?